Friday, September 29, 2006

Your Mom and Dad's Wedding Day

Thursday, September 28, 2006


Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Traitors! Someone Call Home Land Security!!!

How dare you wipe your feet on our flag!
Your going down you fuckn' liberal moonbat! Hope you have fun in Gitmo.
Now I got you! What the...FFFAAAWWWKKK!!!

But your our fealess could you!?!

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

What the Boots on the Ground are Saying

Major General John Batiste bitchslaps Rummy and Bush, and tells America to vote against the retards that support them.

Oh yeah, we don't torture...

Monday, September 25, 2006

Blind in Texas Fantasy Football League WK 3

QB Favre, Brett - 28
RB Brown, Ronnie - 10
WR Williams, Roy - 23
k Kasay, John - 18
79 pts / YTD 237

QB Delhomme, Jake - 16
RB McGahee, Willis - 15
WR Driver, Donald - 12
k Hall, John - 4
47 pts / YTD 132

Friday, September 22, 2006

Band of the Week: Velvet Brick

Hugo! Dammit son, get Over Here Now! What the hell were you thinking? Yes..yes, I know he's the devil but there is a time and a place...are you listening to me? Wipe that Pretty smile off your face right now and go to your Room!

See Velvet Brick live Sunday at Headhunters.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

HNT: Teh's Favorite College Football Team

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

T.M.X. Elmo

Karl Rove did this to me. That slick mother fucker moved in and totally ambushed me! The sad thing is he fucked me with that same 'ol same 'ol tactic of "transferring ones weakness and faults onto the opposition" trick. FUCK ME!

A little history...

Fisher Price came to me with this cool "Extreme Elmo" idea to help get me out of the 10 year old "tickle me" funk I was in. They asked me if I wouldn't mind taking time out of my busy day to help them out. "HELL YES!" I said. "I'll get right on it!" This is what I came up with...

I totally couldn't sell 'em on it. Pussies. Then six months later I hear Karl Rove moved in and offered tax cuts and total sovereignty over Indiana for the right to define me, Elmo, into his own image! WTF! That fucker knew I was in Amsterdam and couldn't defend myself! So he proceeded to change the classic liberal, rock hard, kickass, take no shit reputation I worked so hard to create in the 70's, into an all talk, weak ass bitch pundit-like creature...practically over night! HOW DID THIS FUCKING HAPPEN!?! Huh, what? OK, fine mother fucker. It's my fault for vacationing in Amsterdam. Just understand when you see this fake ass Elmo whining, crying and throwing hissy fits on the floor, it's Karl Rove trying to make me look like him, and him look like me...that mother fucker.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Evangelical Hell vs. SpongeBush Dumb Rants

First the ABC report...

The Documentary's Trailer...


Who squats in the White House, A pox on D.C.?
Dim-witted, inane, and clueless is he.

If dangerous nonsense, yer looking to see...
Then shut off yer brain, and vote G-O-P!

His brain is adrift and his mind is at sea.
Stupid and narrow and pious is he!

He gladly is serving the PNAC!
He's spying on you and he's spying on me!

A walking disaster with nations he builds,
He's Dorkus O'Dipstick McDoofus O'Dild!


Special thanks to John Good and Co. via Blognonymous

Monday, September 18, 2006

The Prevention First Act of 2006

Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid (Nev) will introduce The Prevention First Act soon to try and curve the amount of abortions taking place in America, about 1.37 Million per year. The bill targets women under 25, who make up over 50% of the abortions in America.

The bill would prohibit group health plans from excluding contraceptive drugs, devices and outpatient services if they cover the cost of other prescription drugs and outpatient services. It would also require the secretary of health and human services to disseminate information on emergency contraception to healthcare providers and require hospitals receiving federal money to provide emergency contraception to victims of sexual assault.

The bill would also mandate that federally funded programs provide information about contraceptives that is medically accurate and includes data on health benefits and failure rates.

I can't wait for this vote. We'll get to see how many conservatives actually want to prevent abortions and how many just want to throw young heathen women in jail.

Blind in Texas Fantasy Football League GM 2

Manning, Peyton IND - 31
Johnson, Rudi CIN - 34
Wayne, Reggie IND - 13
Lindell, Rian BUF - 11
WK2 89pts / YTD 158

Brunell, Mark STL - 12
Bush, Reggie NOS - 6
Harrison, Marvin IND - 12
Carney, John NOS - 8
WK2 38 / YTD 85

Friday, September 15, 2006

What Language Will You Be Speaking?

Thursday, September 14, 2006

BNT: Bush with Ketchup

This is what happens when a conservative woman tries to do a pole dance.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Get Up Mother Fucker the Sun's Up

Truth. It's as simple as that. One word that gives Karl Rove the leverage he needs to win. That's right you dumb ass, he fucks you with the truth. Don't believe me? Then why are you bitchn' so much about XYZ Broadcasting Company spreading lies? You see, that's what he wants. As long as you're bitchn' and moan'n about how they lie your wasting valuable energy that could be spent telling the truth. The one thing Karl Rove so desperately enlisted you to retard for him.


We have an ace in the hole! TRUTH! Give me stories of heroes and saints but give me the truth without mention of the lie the other side puts up as a facade. If you stress on the lie you damages the crop. The truth nourishes.

Just a thought.

Monday, September 11, 2006

Blind in Texas Fantasy Football League GM 1

Elmo takes the early lead!

Kurt Warner - 27 pts
Reggie Bush - 11 pts
Larry Fitzgerald - 13 pts
Jeff Wilkins - 18 pts
Total - 69 pts YTD - 69 pts

Donavan McNabb - 27 pts
Shawn Alexander - 5 pts (ouch!)
Chad Johnson - 5 pts
Shane Graham - 10 pts
Total 47 pts YTD - 47 pts

Friday, September 08, 2006

Band of the Week: Verneshot

It doesn't take a Secant Case, or any other root-finding algorithm to figure out Bush/Rove's tactics; straight Repose in the tragic lie that America's Needs are being met. Liars and Atamans, devils in disguise.

See Verneshot live tonight at redruM.


Tuesday, September 05, 2006

It's Al Qaeda Stupid!!!

"We care about Osama Bin Laden this much"

Did you see Alberto Gonzonerd get pined down by Wolff Blitzer? Wolf repeatedly asked "is catching Osama Bin Laden the top priority for this administration?" He said "no" by refusing to answer. Wolf interviewed Max Cleland next and asked what he thought about Alberto Gonzonerd not considering Bin Laden a priority, his response..."I don't agree with a damn thing he says!" Fuck yeah, smash that pansy!

Crooks and Liars has the video here.

Friday, September 01, 2006


This is what Geoffrey at Dog Snot Diaries posted as me...he's jealous. However, I do admire the use of retards in satirical fashion, so he gets an A+ there. But, you see, he is too scared to show his DD214, he probably doesn't have one, most chickenhawks don't. here chicky chicky, come on boy...
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